it's a boy

i feel like i've been in labor. i know i haven't, and i know that until i have a baby, i won't know what that's like, but today has been one of the most painful, beautiful, maddening days i've ever had.

this morning, we were ready for court at 8:30. we were taken to the courthouse for a 10:00 hearing, only to be taken to court at 9:15. remember that all week, everything has been 2 hours LATER than we've been told, so this was really weird.

the hearing was so painful. we knew that in order to adopt dennis, the child protection services rep would have to explain dennis's situation. that meant saying out loud that dennis's mom is an alcoholic, and that she'd abandoned him. in america, we tend to gloss over things, even when we're being truthful. we probably would have said, she has an issue with alcoholism, and is unable to care for her child well. not in moldova. they just flat out say that she up and left her child. that's when i lost it. i kept thinking, dear God, please, if we're not his family, there must be one for him somewhere.

they continued to plead our case, since it was so "different." we are so young, and he is so old. they told the judge about his sister, who is already in america, and how they needed to be together. this went on and on.

finally, the judge announced the finding of the court. and this is what he said. "the birth certificate will be changed to dennis merryman. the parents will be jonathan merryman and emily merryman. the birthdate and place will remain the same." not, congratulations, you're parents. not, congratulations, you have a home. but the government will recognize you as the parents of this child, and his name will be changed.

one funny thing - the judge did get a bit upset because we wanted his full name to be Dennis Morozov Merryman, so that we could honor his heritage, and maintain his last name as his middle. in moldova, they don't have middle names. the judge said, this is illegal to have two last names. you must choose one. and in that moment, i think i knew that it was real. dennis would be a merryman forever more - he was ours.

anyway, the day progressed, consisting of the following: 1 hour in the parking lot of a baby orphanage inside a car with no heat (it's 30 degrees today); 15 minutes of sitting outside a grocery store while someone took our money to buy MORE cake for the orphanage to celebrate with; 45 minutes of searching for dennis's mother's house, and finding she was not home; 2 hours in a french coffee shop in downtown chisinau telling dennis about algebra II; 2 hours waiting in a fancy restaurant for everyone else to get there; 2 hours of eating foreign food in the fanciest room in moldova; 1 hour of explaining things like "allowance," "car insurance," and "airplanes."

it's been a long day. i have seen more of an un-american government than i care to. and i have a son. a precious son, who ordered tiramisu at a restaurant just because i said it was my favorite.

thank you all for praying and thinking of us during this time. i can't wait until you all can meet my beautiful 15-year-old.