to make up for the lack of pictures

i'm terrible at posting photos. really. i don't have the patience for it. but today, i am taking a day off, so i'm at home. and, although i really need to clean the bathroom, i thought i'd post some 2009 photos. also, our little boy loves to play with the camera. and somehow, we haven't been able to get our photos looking quite right since he came. bless his heart....

this is dennis at his first American job. that's right, folks.

he flipped his way through may, june and july of 2009.

i don't think i ever blogged about matilda. i had this dream where we adopted another schnauzer. and my good husband humored me and let me talk to the schnauzer rescue group. and they introduced us to matilda. as you can see, the only one happy in this situation was me. not even matilda was very happy. so she went back to live with her rescue mom and we came to know that we are officially a one-dog-family. for now.

i just love this. dennis and dad are grilling out in the rain. dennis is the official umbrella holder and jon is wearing my crocs.

the last time nana and pops came to visit, nana and i were enjoying our first cup of coffee as (we thought) the only ones awake. i happened to glance out the front window. and this is what i saw. he's painting the house. hilarious.

this is dennis and me in the nashville airport, waiting to board the plane to mexico.

poor kid is already a pro at the one-armed self portrait shots.

this is jon "dancing" in senor frog's in cancun. yes, that sign is pointing to me.

there. i feel better. once i start looking through our photos, i always resolve to pull out the camera more often. but i've always been in the "if you're present in the moment, you'll remember the memory much better" camp of photo-taking. too bad my memory's not so great these days.

Tah-key Day

Okay folks, you can officially have a heart attack.

Two Merryman blogs in one day!

But I just had to blog about another experience from my day - cause it's funny. :)

At least, I think so... I'm not as great a writer as Emily, but here goes...

So... NSA, Dennis's arts magnet, is crazy. In so many ways. It's a great school but ever since they opted out of standard school attire allowing their students to wear saggy pants and trench coats - I have to admit I've stopped trusting their decision making abilities.

So NSA is having spirit week. No sports teams. They're going to cheer at their art work. Which I'm cool with. What I'm a little not cool with is "Gender Switch" day. Really? Is that still okay? Because in an art school full of children wrestling with gender confusion already I feel like dress like the opposite sex day is a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. We aren't doing these kids any favors by saying - just try this stuff on - it's fun! You'll like it! YAY Spirit Week!

Okay, so you know where I stand on that... :) So Dennis tells me the days... School Color Day (I have no idea what those are because you don't have cheers at games to teach you - probably black and black - emo kids...sheesh...), Pajama Day - (oh Lord, from what I see when I drop Dennis off, this one is going to be a disaster, too.) Then there is Decade Day - you can pick any decade. Chaos - I'm way to theme-y for that... (but I did hear dennis say he thinks he'll wear socks pulled up and his smallest soccer shorts. I told him he'd need Emily's opinion on how to dress like the 80's - knowing she would have just the right way of saying - little shorts show your business - lets keep that covered!) And finally Tah-key day.

So, then I say - "Dennis, what is Tah-key day?" He says - "You know, where people dress Tah-key." So I think (as I often have to - what would this sound like with a bright A sound? Oh, right TACKY Day!) So, without thinking I say... "Why do you need a day for that - it's like every day at NSA - why don't you do something totally wild and dress in standard school attire for old times sake!" (no response - just a look like - "oh, dad...")

So, a few days have gone by, and even after the ridiculous ride to school this morning that Emily wrote about, and me wanting to just open the door in front of the Nolensville Road Salvation Army and say - you're so smart, why don't you find your way to school... he asks as we pull up to school... "Is tah-key offensive?" I say... "Not really, it's not like saying a bad word or calling someone a name." He says, "Okay, good." I obviously have to inquire why he asked... :) He says... "Well, I was making posters after school to get everyone to dress for Spirit Week (good little student council-er like his dad) and I was drawing images on the posters to help visual learners. (He probably heard that from me, Lord...) I drew like man and woman symbols on gender switch and pajama pants for pajama day... and for tah-key day I just wrote NSA.

OML (that's oh - my - Lord!) Jesus help me! So I said... "Oh, Dennis that is kind of offensive!" He asks why. :) I say - "Well, saying someone's outfit is tacky is like saying they're an idiot because they couldn't match their clothes. " "Oh, oh no." he says... :) So I say, "Yeah - it's like saying - look - all of you are stupid and can't dress! YAY! Dress like that today!" (which I pretty much believe but should have never alluded too in front of him - I'm learning to be a dad of a teenager at 31.)

Dennis, dear Dennis says: "But when you get ready to leave the house Emily tells you your clothes look tah-key." I laughed hard on the inside and said... "That doesn't make it kind! Emily does her best to keep me from looking like a fool and dressing tah-key - but you shouldn't tell your whole school that - that's why they have mamas! (even though these mamas must be blind or have no control over their children...)

So he said he was going to go to run to Ms. Miranda, his student government sponsor, and see if he could change it. :) (And don't worry, I did let him know that the appropriate thing to draw was someone in stripes AND plaids, or something like that.)

Why can't they just have Crazy Hat Day like we did! (Man I wore that Goofy hat with the buck teeth from Disney world every year like a champ) :) Or bring back Backwards Day -- remember Kris Kross? :)

So tonight as I get ready to make a pot of chili for my family, I'm thankful that...

1. Dennis is learning, slowly, to say A like cat, hat, and tacky.

2. Dennis is opting out of Gender Switch Day. (cause, student council member or not, I wouldn't let him out of the house even if he wanted to participate)

3. Ms. Miranda hadn't hung the posters up yet.

4. Emily keeps me from looking afright.

chili. hell's kitchen. sleep. :)

have mercy...

our little d will be driving soon. very soon. although not as soon as he thinks if he keeps THIS up.

in TN, you have to have 180 days of "practice" before they'll let you have a license even if you're 16.

as usual, we're down to the wire. his 180 days will be up next month, and we haven't let him practice as much as we probably should have. we live in a pretty bustling area, and quite frankly, we're usually running late to wherever we're going and it's usually my fault. and if we're late, then i probably CANNOT HANDLE a teenager driving which would inevitably make us later. it makes my teeth itch. really.

so this week, jon has taken on the responsibility of letting dennis drive to school. he's a trooper...i do not deserve his husbandness.

only dennis is acting progressively stinkier as the week wears on. take note: it is tuesday. you'd have to get jon to tell you exactly, since i wasn't present, but their conversation this morning went something like this:

DENNIS
"i think you're wondering how i know to stop the car."

JON
"um, i would hope you're watching the car in front of you to see when they brake."

DENNIS
"no. i like to look far in the distance. i can see the brakes of cars far ahead of me in the reflection on the pavement."
please note: it has been raining for 39 days here. God hasn't broken his promise yet, but he's getting awfully close.

JON
"well, that's not safe. you really need to watch the car in front of you, since that's the one you'll hit first. if you DO happen to hit the car in front of you, it will cost you at least $2500 to fix."

DENNIS
"it doesn't help me drive better when you try to scare me like that. and i think looking in front of you or looking far ahead of you is a matter of opinion."

You see, to teenagers, they are ALWAYS RIGHT. so if you say something that's different from what they believe, it becomes "your opinion." PLUS, we don't have any point of reference on this whole thing. by this point, most parents have worked through several milestones with their child. nope. not us. this is it.

HOWEVER. i wonder if driving isn't the worst thing that could happen at this point. i'm giving you a BONUS STORY!

last week, jon had to work a conference downtown. dennis has to ride the metro bus to jon's office normally in the afternoons, and that bus goes to the downtown "hub" first. so jon (without asking me) decided that it would be a great idea if dennis just got off the bus at the downtown hub so jon could meet him without having to pick him up south of town.

my husband. he is funny. he decided that it would FANtastic to give dennis the GPS from his car, pre-programmed with the conference's address. then, dennis could just get off the bus, turn the GPS on and then walk the three or four blocks to meet jon.

y'all. my little orphan son was walking through downtown with a GPS. i'm pretty sure it would be on an episode of perfect strangers if it were on today. only i wouldn't do the dance of joy. nope. i'm pretty sure someone reported us to DHS.

he DID make it safely to jon...even checked in, got a name badge and found jon. we really have no need to worry about him. it's us you've gotta worry about.

i'm concerned

when i was little, i always knew my mother's "sound" when someone died. someone famous...not someone we actually knew. for some reason, the one that most clearly stands out was when Red Skelton died. i'm fairly sure i remember her shedding a tear and moaning, "awwww...red skelton died." and then she or my daddy would launch into a story about said dead person. if they were a big deal, the stories could get lengthy. if it was a little-known-dead-person, there wouldn't be a story. just a qualifier. like, "oh, so-and-so died. they starred in this show i watched when i was seven."

i remember thinking: i will know i am old when i know the folks that die.

so...when we were in cancun, john hughes died. i will always remember that death as the one where i thought, "awww...john hughes died. insert qualifier." i felt old. i learned how to be a teenager at the hand of molly ringwald...who was at the at hand of john hughes.

and michael jackson (i think that happened first, but for some reason, john hughes's death touched me more. maybe the lack of drama.)

and ted kennedy.

i found out about jack-o's death on facebook.

and tonight, i found out that patrick swayze died on facebook, too.

weird to think that my kids will not be hanging out around the tv when they announce someone dies. they'll probably update me on the deaths of the icons that shaped my child-and-early-adulthood.

i'm finally at the age when i grieve over icons. and i'm living in the age when the nightly news is not where....wicky, wicky, wicky...you hear it...first.

i'll get used to it. i'm sure it's just where we are. but i've gotta tell you...after someone really cool like patrick swayze dies and you hear it on facebook...you're a little scared to log on. just a little.

hearteningly, i found out about teddy kennedy's death on the today show. i am so thankful for matt and meredith...meredith, in this case. they break death to you like a good friend would...with respect for your family and the families of all involved. no 140-character posts to hide behind. in fact, matt and meredith don't hesitate to spend a couple of hours breaking the news.

....pause....

i'm watching kanye west on leno. i'm uncomfortable. maybe live is not a good idea. maybe artists should be edited.

i am sad for kanye. i don't think he's completely crazy. only a little.

good job, jay...it takes a seasoned interviewer to save that.

...and...action....

matt and meredith, after their two hours of breaking the news, they get to hand the torch to ann curry who does at least two dateline specials on the departed.

i think i prefer the nbc way of breaking the news. it helps you move through. when facebook breaks it, you kind of move on. i miss my emotions.

i've got this weird hang-up.

hello, blog-world. i've missed you. you've helped me identify a serious issue that i have. the longer i put off something, the harder it is to do. it's this weird paradox that i can't quite figure out. but i've learned that sometimes you just have to take the bull by the horns.

my last post was in june. june was about the time that i was transitioning into events at my job. i was hired to do internal communications and then our company reduced our events and communications teams. no one really told me to take over events. another thing i've learned about myself recently is that i pretty much just "do." if it needs to be done, i just learn and adapt until i can complete it. so, more than being told i needed to "do" events, i just sort of absorbed it. and i love it. but it also has taken so much more of me than i thought it would.

so in the beginning of my newly-self-created position, i thought: wow. i shouldn't blog tonight. i should work. and if i'm not working, i should be hanging with my family. because my hours are long and even when i'm not at work, i'm still at work. and so, i'd skip blogging.

also, when we started blogging, sometimes i would sneak in a good post at work. only now, there's no time for sneaking. again, that curious guilt thing would creep in and say: i've got something really great to share with my little blogspace. only if i were more dedicated to my craft, i wouldn't blog at work, i'd be researching the proper number of chairs for the next big event. that way i could do work at work and then go home and do home at home. that would be great. so i'd skip blogging.

and then, this funny thing happened. i got used to working events and communications and things started coming to me during work hours, and i even took off the little blackberry holster i would sometimes wear to bed (kidding). so it would seem that i would have time to blog. but i would look at this pretty computer and think: now it would be so stupid to blog because i've neglected it so long. i wouldn't even know where to start. and people would know that i'm wishy-washy and can't keep up anything for a long period of time. and they already think i'm not dedicated because i can't daily post like you're supposed to when you commit to this blog-thing. i am a failure...ho, hum and woe is me. and i would skip blogging.

but today, my husband is napping. and my son is listening to some crazy moldovan or celtic music upstairs while painting and my dog is looking out the window. and i have no excuse.

who am i kidding? anyone who reads this post probably has just as many kooky hang-ups as i do, plus they have little kids and much more complicated lives and jobs than i do. really, this blog is for me. it's for me to practice writing so that one day i will be good enough to press print and someone will pay me for the way i string words and place commas or not. also it's for us to connect with people who care about us and who we care for as well so that we have a jumping-off place when we sit down on the patio to visit with you.

to further make my point about this curious guilt that overtakes me: i've been married for about 4 and 1/2 years. when we were wed, people loved us well. gifts came in by the boat-load. we were blessed beyond measure and well-prepared to start our life together. in the beginning of the engagement/gifting period, i wrote thank you notes promptly. there was something so thrilling about putting pen to paper that said "jon and emily."

i continued to do really well until about the month before the wedding. those of you who are married know that this is the time when most showers are thrown, but also, you're down to the wire with wedding planning and house-buying and dress-fittings. and writing thank-you notes is something you just sort of work in to the mix. and i got them all written.

and then jon and i got married and moved into our new house. there was a box-full of notes that i wrote when we were at our old house that i didn't address. this was before google was really good at finding people. it was a safer time, but also a more difficult time to just get things done. in the midst of the move, the box of notes without addresses got packed, but never sent.

about 6 months ago (or so), jon and i rearranged our bedroom. there, underneath a dresser, was the box. when i saw it, i got all queasy. this meant that people that wanted to bless us had gone without that most primal of satisfactions - the satisfaction of being appreciated. i resolved to mail them off to their rightful addresses.

only every time i go to grab that box and do what is right, i can't even touch it. because if i sent the notes now, people would think: wow. 5 years is a long time. i don't even remember what i bought them...did they even mean the thanks behind the note? and so i skip the post office.

as i write this, i know the right thing to do. and by posting it, i have admitted to the whole world that i have a problem. and i can admit to you...hopefully without fear of rejection...that i will mail those notes next weekend. period. i will buy a box of bigger envelopes and put a note in them that tells this story and slap a new stamp on them. and hope that the federal government is more timely than i am.

that feels so, so good. it's not action, but it's the promise thereof and it is good.

so, here i am, mr. blogger. i've missed you. can we talk again tomorrow? oh, you're right. it'll probably be a couple of days.